Archive for the ‘gay wedding’ Category

 

The Marriage Mix

Monday, October 11th, 2010

I am delighted to announce the publication of my first book: The Marriage Mix, How to Create Interfaith/Interspiritual/Intercultural Wedding Ceremonies.

  • A Step-by-Step Guide for Interfaith/Interspiritual/Intercultural Wedding Officiants
  • An A-Z Resource of Ideas and Tools for Creating Meaningful and Custom Ceremonies
  • A Model for How to Connect with Couples, including Same-Sex Couples, in Deep and Personal Ways as They Plan for Their Wedding Day and Build a Foundation for Their Future Together
  • Plus a useful Handbook for Marriage-Bound Couples

Buy on Amazon Today!

-Rev. Lynn

The Power of Authenticity

Friday, October 8th, 2010

To set the tone of this blog, I am sharing these words.

The real beloved is that one who is unique,
who is your beginning and your end.
When you find that one,
you’ll no longer expect anything else.

These are words written in the 13th century by Persian poet, Rumi, who passionately loved another man.

A short time ago in these United States of America, women and men who sincerely loved another of their own gender were not able to express their profound commitment to one another by marrying. Same-Sex couples did not have the legal right to be wed as they are now able to do as a result of their determination, personal risk and dedication to authenticity. This is cause for admiration and applause.

In the coming years, people of entire political and religious spectrums will look back and wonder how that right could ever have been denied–the right to be recognized, protected and given the benefits of married couples by our government, our neighbors and even ourselves. This will be much akin to the way we incredulously recall the historical shift in status of American women and black citizens when they gained the right to vote.

There is really only one question that everyone needs to be asked. What is really important in life? Is there anyone who can deny that love is the bottom line? The desire to love and to be loved is both irresistible and universal. When we are lucky and love’s power finds us, we become vulnerable to its vagaries. Genuine love is not logical and has little to do with age, race, wealth or gender. Love is a magnificent experience that has everything to do with feelings of familiarity, loyalty, support, values, and yes, physical warmth. Everyone deserves ownership to love whomever they wish!

Whoopi Goldberg said it best: “Really, darling, it’s a no-brainer. You know, I understand not everybody is for gay marriage. But if you’re not for gay marriage, don’t marry a gay person…”

–Rev. Lynn

Photo Above, Rev. Lynn Gladstone joyously performed the wedding of Martin and Oliver in CA, 2015
Photographer jessicacastroweddings.com

Love Makes the World So Much Better

Tuesday, October 5th, 2010

They were dressed to the nines.

One was clad handsomely in white tails, decorated tastefully with silver embroidery, appearing as out of a vintage fantasy. The other wore a strapless gown sewn from endless yards of pale pastel tulle – flowing Iayers to the ground and resembling a most enticing, multi-tiered wedding cake.

That’s what I saw when I walked into the venue to perform their wedding ceremony one hour hence.

They greeted me enthusiastically, telling each other, “Yay, Lynn is there, now we can thankfully calm down.” I was touched by this observation and happy that they felt I would help to assuage their nervousness.

There was, as always, last minute work to be done. We convened in the Bride’s Room, an annex off the restaurant’s main room where dinner would later be served to 135 hungry and celebrating guests.

I had this hour to acquaint myself with two sets of parents and to corral, meet, congratulate and direct the other members of the wedding party.

This couple had opted to not have the rehearsal the night before, rather to do it just before the ceremony and prior to any guests arriving. Then there were witnesses to locate so that the marriage license could to be legally signed.

There are nearly always a glitch or two that want to dominate a joyful occasion and in this case, that rule of thumb prevailed.

The parents, who were to bring the suitcase, inside of which were packed all the last minute essentials, including the required marriage license, were teeth-grindingly delayed in traffic. And the guests were outside pouring into the courtyard.

While we waited, I offered up the mounting anxiety to a spirit of faith that all would work out fine, serving to relax the wedding twosome. I requested some moments of privacy with them so that we could have a brief meditation and the imparting of my message of beautiful imagery and perspective. As a result, another round of calm found its way into the couple’s demeanor.

Then, it was discovered their vows had been left at home on the bedroom bureau and worry returned. Having learned that an officiant, like a Girl Scout, must always be prepared, I reached into my portfolio of tricks and pulled out a copy of their vows. The room filled with an extra dose of oxygen that came from the enormous sighs of relief.

At last and as usual, everything began to fall into place: the parents and suitcase had finally arrived, the license was signed and witnessed, the wedding party participants had rehearsed and lined up correctly knowing their parts and guests were seated outside – al fresco in anticipation.

The processional music began. At the agreed cue from the DJ, one by one, we made our way down the center aisle, surrounded on both sides by the beaming smiles of those attending. Joy was in the night air.

Throughout the ceremony, this couple stood facing each other adoringly, clasping hands, their sometimes tearing eyes seeing no one else and grinning. Their ceremony spoke of welcoming friends and family, remembering the departed, inviting spirit to the altar.

The guests heard a good deal about them, how they met and how their bond and love grew over years of adventures and toil. They partook in a sharing of wine ritual and presented their heartfelt personal intentions and vows. And, as I always do at all marriage ceremonies, I blessed them and legally pronounced them, “It is now my great pleasure to present you as wife and wife.”

My professional aim is to always create a unique ceremony that speaks specifically about each couple. Yet, each ceremony requires some standard elements, regardless of religious or non-religious affiliation and regardless of gender. So often, when people hear that I am an interfaith and interspiritual minister, they ask if I perform same-gender marriages. I answer with an enthusiastic “Yes”, though I am slightly baffled by this query, as my role is to legalize love. Love has been around for eons and we have been eons overdue in recognizing that love between any two people is love that cannot be denied. Whom people love is a universal right; it is a treasure that makes our world go ‘round and makes it so much better. As it always has and always shall.  Amen.

–Rev. Lynn
Photo Above, Danna & Hillary, Married Oct. 2013
Photographer Erica Camille
Wedding Video by Christian Mortensen