Lynn’s Tips


Step 1 To Begin Envisioning Your Wedding Ceremony: 

During a quiet time at home, after a home-cooked meal (or ordered-in), put on some gentle and inspiring music. Turn off the phone. Get comfortable, sitting next to each other. Sit in silence. Let your minds and hearts go where they will.

After two minutes tell each other what you have experienced during the silence.

Now take some time in turn to talk about:

  • Your favorite colors
  • Your favorite flower
  • Your special song/lyrics
  • A book you love
  • A memorable quote
  • An unforgettable film
  • Your earliest shared memory

Jot down notes about what was said.

Have a hug and enjoy the rest of your day.


Get comfortable with photographs of your child spread out on a table. Look closely at each one. For each make a written note of a single word that describes what you are noticing or feeling. Study the words. Now try to write a letter or poem to your child. Keep what you have created to give to your child when he/she can read.


Ask yourself:

  • What am I celebrating/ritualizing?
  • Why am I celebrating/ritualizing this?
  • With whom do I want to share this ceremony?
  • What place of meaning would I want to celebrate at?
  • Is there a significant date or season in which I want to celebrate?
  • What type of music might accompany this event?
  • Are there any rituals I specifically want to incorporate?
  • Are there readings that I want included?
  • Do I want certain meaningful objects around me?
  • What am I seeking by having this ceremony?

Smile at yourself in the mirror and jot down your answers.


First thing to do: Congratulate yourself!!! You have recognized that something(s) in your life is going off course. You have made a deliberate decision to seek professional help and that is truly to be applauded. Life in the modern age is so darn complex and fast that sometimes it’s hard to catch your emotional breath all by yourself. Fortunately, there are many caring and talented therapists ready to hear your story, your woes and help you find your way to what you want for yourself.

When seeking a therapist it is most desirable to get a recommendation from a trusted friend, family member, mentor or medical professional. Try to get a few names and spend the time and money interviewing two or three therapists. I guarantee that your intuition, your gut will tell you which one to choose. If none of them appeal, try out more and remember that you are in charge of this choice.

Deciding to go into therapy and the therapeutic relationship may seem a bit daunting at the start. That is a normal feeling. It also may be, for you, a welcome relief. I recommend giving your therapy at least a month of sessions before you think about walking out the door.

Be patient with yourself. Subtle, slow and steady growth is the one that sticks. If you take one step forward and then two steps backwards, do not fret. As you do the work, make the commitment and live out what you are learning new about yourself, you will find progress. It is the surest investment out there. I wish you the best!

–Rev. Lynn

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